Hey guys & girls!
Last night was our 2nd adoption class and it was awesome. Not only did we get a fireworks show thanks to the Titans playing the Steelers and kickoff going on during the class, but we got to meet a couple that had adopted through our agency and hear their story. It was inspiring and made us cry. But it was so nice to hear a success story after the long road ahead. The class has been awesome to relieve some fears and confirm some things we already knew but just need to keep hearing. The other couples are pretty awesome and I have become the class mom who brings a treat each week. Week one was cookies, snickerdoodles & chocolate chip. Week two was Monster Munch. Week three is going to be Owl Cupcakes. I have no idea how I functioned in life without Pintrest....or a GPS...or my phone....but that's another blog for another day. :)
One thing that we did talk about was infertility grief and man does that ever draw up emotions in a room full of couples aching to be parents that have been let down time and time again. But it also provided comfort to know that we weren't alone. Every person in that room had experienced similar things and they have made it to this point because they are strong and faithful people. It was a pretty cool revelation. Michael and I talked about it and I cried the whole way home. Not because I was sad, but it was just this emotional outflow that had been waiting to come out and finally finding a place where everyone else is just like me....it was a little overwhelming (in a good way). I have long been a person that didn't want to be like everyone else and didn't want to be "normal." I like to stand out and do my own thing, be it popular or not (wrestling t-shirts at the office should always be a popular decision...just saying). But this was one thing that I needed to find a place where I had something in common with some other people and I have and they are amazing people and I am very thankful for them to be around me and sharing their stories. I also want to thank those of you reading this that have shared your stories. I want you to know something too. I am so thankful that each story you have told me has ended in a baby for you. I have said prayers of thanks for you and those kiddos, because I am so happy that your struggles ended in such amazing ways. And those stories are such inspiration to me and to anyone else who knows what you went through. You guys are just stinkin' awesome :)
With that all said, today was a little tough. IUI #4 officially didn't take and now we are in holding for at least a month until we can meet with the doctor to revisit our plan. The things he wants us to think about are IVF, laproscopy (sp?) surgery, and injectables (7-12 days of self administered shots along with a treatment). I can pretty much guarantee IVF is out based on expense. $10K for IVF isn't possible with the adoption, and I can't turn my back on adoption. God has called me to that and I am in it to win it now. The surgery...well it's basically exploratory. They are searching for anything to give reason for why this isn't working for us since everything else has turned up nothing. I am not sure how comfortable I am with that. It's a lot to think about. I have 1 month before we see the doctor so there will be plenty of prayers going up to make the best decision I can that clearly aligns with God's path. But again adoption will not take a back seat to this. I wish I could tell you how heavy on my heart this has been laid, but it is something that is just meant to happen. Not saying the road won't have bumps, but I can feel in my heart it's the right road to be on.
So even though it was a little tough to take in today, it is still a good day as it is one day closer to our adoption. Each day I realize we are only getting closer and it's a pretty cool thought but it also stresses me out because those that know me well know I am a planner and I feel like I have in no way planned for a baby to be here! I have crossed the things off the adoption home study list but where in the world do I plan on this child sleeping? LOL So look for soon to be nursery posts coming your way :)
OH! And before I forget...those that sent me recipes THANK YOU SO MUCH!! I am starting to compile the cookbook now. I think it will take me a week or two to get it in order and the entries submitted. I cannot wait to get the copies here! I got the sample and it's awesome. And thank you guys for giving little Simsy (corny I know - I'll try and do better) a start at a great life and a full tummy! :)
Love ya'll to pieces!
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